Holiday EQ Challenge, Part 1 of 2
It is rarely a lack of cognitive horsepower that derails careers, loses sales, damages relationships, or results in failed leadership initiatives.
Instead, these setbacks and missed opportunities usually result from a lack of emotional intelligence.
You probably already know this. Certainly we have said it more than once, and it is well-supported by research.
That doesn’t mean that logic and reasoning skills, knowledge, and experience don’t matter.
It’s just that everyone around you has already been screened for those capabilities through the educational system and the hiring process, both of which are heavily biased toward developing cognitive skills, but emotional intelligence—not so much.
Opportunity Knocks
There are two bits of good news, though!
- Emotional intelligence can be developed through intentional practice, and
- Each year, we all have an amazing opportunity for a period of intense EQ training. They’re called HOLIDAYS!
This week and next, we’re going to illustrate the fifteen emotional intelligence dimensions of the EQ-i 2.0 model, with a little fun and humor that you can hopefully relate this holiday season.
Here we go!
The Self-Perception Composite
Self-Regard is...
Respecting yourself while understanding and accepting your strengths and weaknesses.
Low |
High |
|
Feeling bad about yourself because your house and gifts don't look like the December edition of Southern Living meets the New York City Macy's window display. |
Rocking the ugliest of sweaters, singing off key, burning the cookies to cinder, and laughing at your beautiful imperfection. |
Self-Actualization is...
A willingness to persistently try to improve yourself and engage in the pursuit of personally relevant and meaningful objectives that lead to a rich and enjoyable life.
Low |
High |
|
You've binged so much Netflix that the recommendation algorithm finally says, "Don't you have something you'd rather do?" |
You scheduled five weeks worth of activities in your five days off, and you're just sure you can find a way to do them all! |
Emotional Self-Awareness is...
The ability to recognize and understand your own emotions.
Low |
High |
|
During the company holiday party, you have a strong urge to either hide in the bathroom or push your coworker down the stairs, but your not sure which option to choose or why. |
You can accurately categorize your relatives' comments into those that trigger guilt, vs. the ones that trigger exasperation, annoyance, anxiety, or tension. |
The Self-Expression Composite
Emotional Expression is...
Openly expressing your feelings verbally and non-verbally.
Low |
High |
|
Your brother surprises you by restoring your late father's watch and giving it to you as a gift. You give him a fist bump, say "thanks, bro," and suddenly need to "go check something" in the garage. |
Seizing the opportunity to tell people how much you love them. Letting them see it on your face. Not assuming they already know. |
Assertiveness is...
Communicating thoughts and beliefs openly, as well as defending personal rights and values in a non-offensive and non-destructive manner.
Low |
High |
|
"Sure! I can whip up a gluten-free, dairy-free, nut-free, low-carb entree for twenty-six people between getting off work on Friday and the dinner party at seven. Noooo! It's no bother at all." |
"I love you all. This has been amazing. I can't wait to do it again, but it's been three days and you gotta get out of my house!" |
Independence is...
The ability to self-direct; being able to plan, decide, and complete daily tasks autonomously, free from emotional dependency.
Low |
High |
|
"That's fine, I'll go to the club for New Year's Eve. I mean, yeah, I hate crowds, loud music, and bad champagne, but it'll be great." |
"Y'all have fun downtown. I'll be exactly where I want to be: on the couch, in my PJs, with my dog when the ball drops." |
Next Week...
Next week, in a special Monday edition, we'll cover the remaining dimensions to ensure you are fully prepared to take advantage of this unique opportunity to practice your EQ skills.
In the meantime, you can use our Emotional Intelligence Essentials online course as a handy reference, and take the EQ-i 2.0 assessment to get some hard data on where to focus your efforts!
Until next time,
Greg
